What I am about to say is obvious, any teacher knows the importance of assessments. Assessments are an integral part of education. They have value in that they provide a probing into performance and progression. Evaluations allow us as teachers, to understand how well we did at facilitating a lesson as much as they demonstrate the acuity of our students. Assessments are necessary for so many reasons: They validate growth, expose deficiencies and make evident the needs of our students. They can be formal like a multiple-choice test or informal like a 1-minute check-in, both of which will indicate the need for enrichment or remediation. Assessments of course, are also formative, monitoring growth consistently throughout a unit of study with consistent feedback or summative, like a final exam or end of unit project. Either way, they are a component we can not displace or ignore. They are tools we need to use for more than just calculating a grade. They need to be a part of the process of learning as well as, the advancement of thought and a mechanism of change.
How can we as teachers make assessments a mechanism of change? We need to begin to get creative with our assessments for one. See them as much as a collaborative event as they are an individual component of learning. Secondly, we need to focus not on the data but the implications of that data. In my class, we have grade level quizzes and tests which are aligned. They are used to collect data and to design tier lessons for remediation or differentiation for enrichment. Each TEK/standard is broken down in order for us to check for understanding of the content. We look at a group of students as a whole: 75% got this question right or 90% got this one wrong, now let's go re-teach. Very cut and dry. To me this is effective to a certain degree, I mean you know who is doing well and who isn't, right? But, do you know why?
It is through informal appraisal that I personally can make a difference. Every week for at least one minute, one on one, I look every student in the eye and ask them questions. I make sure they are not confused about anything in the unit and that they feel ready for any grade level assessment that will be given. I also do a lot of different types of assessments: debates, skits, panels, interviews, pod casts and collaborative graffiti walls. I love to have students work together to problem-solve. This not only strengthens their communication skills but also helps them remember the information in a more creative way rather than just memorizing notes. We play games and write parodies of songs about science, I try to make it as interactive as possible. I find the less stress involved the more they commit. The data I collect from these various measurements of growth, what seem to NOT be assessments, gives me an enormous amount of data, more useful data and this I use in one minute check-ins to monitor and tutor my students.
Assessments are very stressful for students. Pencil and paper tests are very cut and dry. They give you a snapshot of an individual students mindset and learning. They are one dimensional. Having students run and play and interact with fellow students and design skits and other creative ways to demonstrate their knowledge, is less stressful for students. Rather than a quick peak into their comprehension we get to see them process and apply their knowledge. The lens is widened and they get to see the big picture and we as teachers get to see them paint it. Broad strokes of information, gelling and congealing into a beautiful mosaic or portrait of their journey. The final touches not coming from our brush but from theirs. They choose the color, the lighting, the subject. We get to sit in anticipation for the cover to be removed and the masterpiece to be revealed. Not on paper but on canvas an ever changing, fluid canvas.
Sunday, October 22, 2017
Saturday, October 21, 2017
Looking Past the A: What Does an A Really Mean: Isolated Achievement or Large Scale Connection?
There are three types of learners: those that have an innate talent or skill where understanding and demonstration come easy, those that through hard work, dedication, motivation and practice achieve their learning, and those that always seem to fall short, they struggle and without tutoring or mentoring they just seem to barely make it, but with a little finesse and facade building they can fake their way to a passing grade and even sometimes an A. All of these students receive A's for projects even assessments but they are mastering the content at very different levels. So, what does an A actually mean?
An A is a snapshot, a glimpse of comprehension. The information aligned for them, creating a synergy of assimilation, perception and realization. But, does that moment of synthesis last? When the class moves on to the next lesson is there a retaining of that knowledge? Can a student store this previous evidence into their database to be pulled and added to future endeavors? Will they see the connections, the bridges between larger concepts? I have seen a student get A's on every test because it is mere memorization of facts. Then fail every lab because that is an application of those facts. How can we teach students that A's are merely necessary markers we use to measure growth? They are just that, a marker. It is far more important to see the big picture and all the intricacies of correlation and interrelationships then to have an obscure set of trivia.
The grade is not the purpose, the relevance, nor is it an indicator of intelligence. I remind my students every time they are assigned a task, that it is the amount of focus that you wield that will give you the greatest return. Effort directly impacts performance and proficiency. We are all proficient at something. We have strengths in certain subjects while we may have interest in others but they may not come to us naturally. In other words, we may have to work harder at some things than others. But, even those things that are second nature or simple for us need nurturing and forging or we become complacent and lose sight of the master plan, the broad view, the big idea. It is these latitudinous notions that if assembled properly will expand our knowledge base and make us better thinkers.
If we know how to think for ourselves, problem-solve and disentangle fact from fiction, truth from falsity, then we will be able to build our world view on a sense of self and self-confidence. An A does not mean we are better or smarter than anyone else. It means we gave it our all, we put forth the effort to succeed and gain insight into the subject matter for which we were tested. Failure is simply an avenue of stones and gravel that we have to traverse at some point in our lives. While success is not a road paved in gold, but a well-traveled path that curves and bends but ultimately reaches a place of understanding. Whichever thoroughfare you are en route upon, does not matter, for the end result will be the same: growth. That is the key to education, to learning, to curiosity and exploration. Not to be transported to the summit without having sacrificed or slipped and lost your footing. You must climb every peak and descend into every valley for the treasure of knowledge to be worth it. To be memorable. To be an inspiration for the next leg of the journey.
A grade is irrelevant in the scheme of things. It is a digit. A simple, abstract concept. It is the acquisition of knowledge that is the drive in all of us, that keeps our minds wandering, our thoughts focused and our imaginations running wild. We have to be free to think for ourselves or the edges of ability and wisdom will forever be blurred. It is when we set aside a monetary standard and value an exclusive and personal trek for growth and enlightenment, that the universe and all of its facets begin to whisper to us. This is the moment when curiosity mutes achievement and ingenuity, enterprise and visualization shadow competitiveness.The only championship in learning is the belief in oneself and the determination to become better. This is what an A truly is, not high marks or a perfect score, but the intimacy between knowledge, humility and adversity that keeps us learning and growing every day.
An A is a snapshot, a glimpse of comprehension. The information aligned for them, creating a synergy of assimilation, perception and realization. But, does that moment of synthesis last? When the class moves on to the next lesson is there a retaining of that knowledge? Can a student store this previous evidence into their database to be pulled and added to future endeavors? Will they see the connections, the bridges between larger concepts? I have seen a student get A's on every test because it is mere memorization of facts. Then fail every lab because that is an application of those facts. How can we teach students that A's are merely necessary markers we use to measure growth? They are just that, a marker. It is far more important to see the big picture and all the intricacies of correlation and interrelationships then to have an obscure set of trivia.
The grade is not the purpose, the relevance, nor is it an indicator of intelligence. I remind my students every time they are assigned a task, that it is the amount of focus that you wield that will give you the greatest return. Effort directly impacts performance and proficiency. We are all proficient at something. We have strengths in certain subjects while we may have interest in others but they may not come to us naturally. In other words, we may have to work harder at some things than others. But, even those things that are second nature or simple for us need nurturing and forging or we become complacent and lose sight of the master plan, the broad view, the big idea. It is these latitudinous notions that if assembled properly will expand our knowledge base and make us better thinkers.
If we know how to think for ourselves, problem-solve and disentangle fact from fiction, truth from falsity, then we will be able to build our world view on a sense of self and self-confidence. An A does not mean we are better or smarter than anyone else. It means we gave it our all, we put forth the effort to succeed and gain insight into the subject matter for which we were tested. Failure is simply an avenue of stones and gravel that we have to traverse at some point in our lives. While success is not a road paved in gold, but a well-traveled path that curves and bends but ultimately reaches a place of understanding. Whichever thoroughfare you are en route upon, does not matter, for the end result will be the same: growth. That is the key to education, to learning, to curiosity and exploration. Not to be transported to the summit without having sacrificed or slipped and lost your footing. You must climb every peak and descend into every valley for the treasure of knowledge to be worth it. To be memorable. To be an inspiration for the next leg of the journey.
A grade is irrelevant in the scheme of things. It is a digit. A simple, abstract concept. It is the acquisition of knowledge that is the drive in all of us, that keeps our minds wandering, our thoughts focused and our imaginations running wild. We have to be free to think for ourselves or the edges of ability and wisdom will forever be blurred. It is when we set aside a monetary standard and value an exclusive and personal trek for growth and enlightenment, that the universe and all of its facets begin to whisper to us. This is the moment when curiosity mutes achievement and ingenuity, enterprise and visualization shadow competitiveness.The only championship in learning is the belief in oneself and the determination to become better. This is what an A truly is, not high marks or a perfect score, but the intimacy between knowledge, humility and adversity that keeps us learning and growing every day.
Friday, October 20, 2017
Pod Cast Examples: A First Attempt at Pod Casting: Endocrine Glands POV
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B7070x_eRLIRS002QURlWnMxOVE/view?usp=drivesdk
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B7070x_eRLIRNnZZY2llcnR5LVk/view?usp=drivesdk
Notice they are not perfect but that students did include all the vital information in a fun way. These are their first attempt at pod casting. Later on I will include some of their pod casts and it will be obvious that trial and error and experience will make their pod casts more professional. But, as a first attempt, they did pretty well. Now its practice, practice, practice and building confidence.
https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B2DNNgtFrwYiVDRYb1kyOEJ2QjA
https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B3ON9Im-gFCqRUdwU1UtSk1CeDA
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B7070x_eRLIRNnZZY2llcnR5LVk/view?usp=drivesdk
Notice they are not perfect but that students did include all the vital information in a fun way. These are their first attempt at pod casting. Later on I will include some of their pod casts and it will be obvious that trial and error and experience will make their pod casts more professional. But, as a first attempt, they did pretty well. Now its practice, practice, practice and building confidence.
https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B2DNNgtFrwYiVDRYb1kyOEJ2QjA
https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B3ON9Im-gFCqRUdwU1UtSk1CeDA
Thursday, October 19, 2017
Interviews, Pod Casting and Collaboration: An Experimentation in Large Group Dynamics
Working in a large collaborative group can be daunting. There are so many voices all trying to be heard, or not heard for that matter. It brings out the best in many people: natural leaders tend to migrate to the forefront. But, it also isolates those quiet voices that tend to be muted by the din of extroverts. Even with the challenges, large group collaboration is a skill every student should be presented with. It pushes them to find their voice and their point-of-view.
Participating in such a high-energy, fluid, environment builds camaraderie as well as strengthening confidence and personal identity. It may seem shaky at first, but given time to overcome the hurdles of personality clashes and the inevitable talking over one another, the process will generally lead to some great results. It reinforces mindfulness and respect and forces students to listen one another.
This week my students had to join up as a team of four to research an assigned Endocrine gland and then as a group combined with a different team to co-produce a podcast: They interviewed each other using the personality and persona of the gland they researched. First person point-of-view, personification, listening and speaking skills, all combined into one assignment. It got loud at times and tempers flared, but in the end, every group recorded an awesome podcast.
Interviews Can Be Tricky
During this activity, the research and data collection was the easiest part for my students. They all received an I-pad or laptop and took notes quickly. Writing questions for the interview installment proved more difficult. Questions that are both interesting and informational were challenging for them to come up with. So, I spent fifteen minutes showing them clips of interviews by Barbara Walters, Ryan Seacrest and Bryant Gumble for some inspiration.
It took them longer to write the questions than anything else. They spent two class periods just practicing with each other, rehearsing and then listening to early versions of their pod cast. They re-wrote questions many times before they got the flow of the pod cast the way they wanted.
Once the questions fell into place and they got the hang of it, they hit the ground running and recorded the pod casts with ease in one or two takes. On average they are about 5 minutes long and chalk full of science, humor and personality. These are the first large group podcasts of the year and all n' all, the activity was a success. Our biggest hurdle was getting them to upload to Google Drive.
Pod casting Reinforces Speaking Skills
I had several students tell me this was "Worse than public speaking." I asked them why? "It is recording in front of my peers. I don't want to cause us to have to re-record." It was definitely a test of endurance and will power. Several groups got frustrated and almost gave up, but with the coaxing and reassurance of their 'leader' they continued and finished the assignment on-time.
I didn't expect pod casts to be more stressful than public speaking. In the end, I am happy I had them pod cast as a large group team. Each group was comprised of 6-8 students. Working in large groups is a skill they are not used to and students need to listen and hear how they sound, in order to grow as listeners and public speakers. They will be creating more pod casts in the next unit, but next time they are going to be 1-minute expert pod casts that they record individually.
Large Group Dynamics
Team work can be intimidating and frustrating but it is a necessary skill in life. Organizing, planning and collaborating are all part of the current job market and social world. The larger the group, the more overwhelming this sized collaboration becomes. The more voices competing for jurisdiction and authority. Being submerged in a fluid, dynamic group coerces those who would not speak to make their presence known. Especially if it is a school activity.
This assignment brought me a lot of insight. I discovered that the more hands off I am and the deeper the current of learning I throw my students into, the more they will swim or catch a wave of knowledge independently. They will collaborate and cooperate to reach a common goal. Clear, concise expectations and the freedom of exploration will bring students into a place where they will take risks and innovate.
While some students recorded a basic interview (the assignment), others created a news cast or simple play. They incorporated their personalities even though they were speaking through the 'mind' of an Endocrine gland. They had meaningful conversations, relied on each others strengths and made sure that everyone's voice was heard. It was a great first experience with pod casting in a large group.
I am looking forward to the individuality I will see shine in their next pod casts. I highly recommend trying pod casting with a large group collaboration. It may seem chaotic and dysfunctional and at first it sort of is, however, it becomes stream-lined and focused very quickly. We can't grow to our full potential without setbacks and hurdles. They learn so much through trial and error and with a bit of irritation and elevation through positive feedback, they struggle though and transform into stronger communicators in the process.
Participating in such a high-energy, fluid, environment builds camaraderie as well as strengthening confidence and personal identity. It may seem shaky at first, but given time to overcome the hurdles of personality clashes and the inevitable talking over one another, the process will generally lead to some great results. It reinforces mindfulness and respect and forces students to listen one another.
This week my students had to join up as a team of four to research an assigned Endocrine gland and then as a group combined with a different team to co-produce a podcast: They interviewed each other using the personality and persona of the gland they researched. First person point-of-view, personification, listening and speaking skills, all combined into one assignment. It got loud at times and tempers flared, but in the end, every group recorded an awesome podcast.
Interviews Can Be Tricky
During this activity, the research and data collection was the easiest part for my students. They all received an I-pad or laptop and took notes quickly. Writing questions for the interview installment proved more difficult. Questions that are both interesting and informational were challenging for them to come up with. So, I spent fifteen minutes showing them clips of interviews by Barbara Walters, Ryan Seacrest and Bryant Gumble for some inspiration.
It took them longer to write the questions than anything else. They spent two class periods just practicing with each other, rehearsing and then listening to early versions of their pod cast. They re-wrote questions many times before they got the flow of the pod cast the way they wanted.
Once the questions fell into place and they got the hang of it, they hit the ground running and recorded the pod casts with ease in one or two takes. On average they are about 5 minutes long and chalk full of science, humor and personality. These are the first large group podcasts of the year and all n' all, the activity was a success. Our biggest hurdle was getting them to upload to Google Drive.
Pod casting Reinforces Speaking Skills
I had several students tell me this was "Worse than public speaking." I asked them why? "It is recording in front of my peers. I don't want to cause us to have to re-record." It was definitely a test of endurance and will power. Several groups got frustrated and almost gave up, but with the coaxing and reassurance of their 'leader' they continued and finished the assignment on-time.
I didn't expect pod casts to be more stressful than public speaking. In the end, I am happy I had them pod cast as a large group team. Each group was comprised of 6-8 students. Working in large groups is a skill they are not used to and students need to listen and hear how they sound, in order to grow as listeners and public speakers. They will be creating more pod casts in the next unit, but next time they are going to be 1-minute expert pod casts that they record individually.
Large Group Dynamics
Team work can be intimidating and frustrating but it is a necessary skill in life. Organizing, planning and collaborating are all part of the current job market and social world. The larger the group, the more overwhelming this sized collaboration becomes. The more voices competing for jurisdiction and authority. Being submerged in a fluid, dynamic group coerces those who would not speak to make their presence known. Especially if it is a school activity.
This assignment brought me a lot of insight. I discovered that the more hands off I am and the deeper the current of learning I throw my students into, the more they will swim or catch a wave of knowledge independently. They will collaborate and cooperate to reach a common goal. Clear, concise expectations and the freedom of exploration will bring students into a place where they will take risks and innovate.
While some students recorded a basic interview (the assignment), others created a news cast or simple play. They incorporated their personalities even though they were speaking through the 'mind' of an Endocrine gland. They had meaningful conversations, relied on each others strengths and made sure that everyone's voice was heard. It was a great first experience with pod casting in a large group.
I am looking forward to the individuality I will see shine in their next pod casts. I highly recommend trying pod casting with a large group collaboration. It may seem chaotic and dysfunctional and at first it sort of is, however, it becomes stream-lined and focused very quickly. We can't grow to our full potential without setbacks and hurdles. They learn so much through trial and error and with a bit of irritation and elevation through positive feedback, they struggle though and transform into stronger communicators in the process.
Saturday, October 14, 2017
The Moment of Inception: A Journey of Empathy
The Moment of Inception
I was twelve, I remember it vividly, I had spilled apple juice on my literature book and the corners of the book were soaked. This had happened in my back pack, a lunch bag explosion that occurred frequently because of the amount of books we had to lug around throughout the day. We couldn't afford a lunch box so my lunches were placed in paper bags, like most of my classmates. But, I chose to stuff mine in the top of my back pack rather than carry it around. Mostly because it generally ripped open at some point, before lunch, spilling the contents all over the floor. The situation made more embarrassing because I was an outsider, a target, and no one would help me pick it up. Instead, they would deliberately stomp on the food or kick my sandwich down the hallway. That day's lunch had a chocolate pudding cup and Mandarin oranges, my favorite, so I was being over protective. Unfortunately this vigilance led to another altercation with my literature teacher.
He did not like me. I was shy and the brunt of most of the jokes that circulated the classroom, which he chose to either laugh at or ignore completely. This in turn, led to more bullying. This day was no exception. When he saw the yellow, juice coated corners of the book he tore it out of my hand and proceeded to demoralize me. "How irresponsible of you. These are brand new books and you ruined it. You are an embarrassment to 7th grade. No wonder every one makes fun of you." Laughter ensued. He told me I had to stay after school and borrow a book and that I no longer had privileges of having my own. A scolding that should have been private at least, became a spectacle of sorts. The teacher across the hall had to come over and investigate the uproar. She was my math teacher, she was always nice to me.
When she entered, the laughter stopped causing even my literature teacher to pause in place. She was a gentle person. never raised her voice, always smiled, but she also had a teacher glare that would cause anyone to second guess their actions. "What's going on in here?" she asked mindfully, a calm in her voice. He walked over to her, showed her the book and began to chuckle and explain how irresponsible I was. She cut him off. "I believe it is you who is being irresponsible, she is twelve and this was an accident and you are an adult and this behavior is deliberate." He thought about responding, but she stood her ground with eye contact, silence, authority. He walked over and handed me back my book. "Let it dry out before you put it back in your back pack. I will make sure you pay for the damages too." As he was walking back to his desk, she turned to me and smiled, winked and gave me a subtle, I got your back smirk. That moment changed my life.
Second Guessing in the Face of Adversity
The teacher gene was turned on that day. With the idealism of a young teacher, I was hyper focused on my students, not on being a team player. I really never had any problems other than my colleagues not appreciating my radical approach. I followed the rules, I even taught with alignment, but then I would find time to venture off and get a little organic, primal. I knew from the moment my literature teacher was shut down by my math teacher, that my focus was always, no matter the consequences, going to be about creating a safe haven for learning and to build relationships with my students. This is a stronghold I have never waned on. Not even slightly. But, it does tend to ruffle feathers. So again I am the brunt of the negative discourse. A situation I am well-adjusted to but would prefer to stay clear of.
Recently I have been called an elitist, an outsider and even the cause of team dynamics not being at optimal. I shut down. I let the voices of judgment linger a little too long and it took me back to that classroom where I was misunderstood and ridiculed for being different. I used to loathe myself because I was Dyslexic and self-confident and ruthlessly determined. When you grow up in the schools I grew up in, witnessing the dark side of education, you become very self aware and you create a persona that you use when you come up against any kind of resistance or incursion. It has taken a lot of reflection and soul searching to get to the bottom of my fear and disillusionment. I have come to see the attributes that I ignore sometimes in self-preservation. Arrogance is one of these and it is something I fail to address sometimes and thus neglect to grow past. It is one thing to be self-confident another to be perceived as elitist and arrogant.
Arrogance can be overt or slight but it is never appreciated. I can come off very arrogant because I hold steadfast to my illusions of mindful relationships and the security of my students. If I up the rigor or push the bar it is only because I know what is best for my students. I do not claim to be the smartest person in the room, I am so not, nor do I claim to know more or be better, I just pronounce that I know what I am doing. What is best for some students may not be the best for others, this I know to be undeniably true. However, for my students, I know. Compromising this for any reason is not on the table. This puts me in the cross-hairs. An uncomfortable place to be. Often, I am seen as the problem because I try to will others to my cause. This is wrong. What I need to do instead, be the best I can be and hope I inspire others. I stay quiet in the face of angry voices and this appears as compliance. What I need to do is to find the bravery, the courage to be like my math teacher from so many years ago, eye contact, silence, authority.
Complaining is Mere Fodder, Action is Momentum
As I reflect in my journal every night, I have been doing more complaining then coming up with solutions. I have been reminded that taking the offensive does not solve problems, often it exacerbates them. It is being made clear to me that when I remain steadfast in my position, I often lose sight of the visions of those around me. I need to open my mind to their point of view and support them as they often neglect to do for me. There is never an excuse to be unprofessional or rude. I have been in the direct line of these emotions and it does not feel good. Rather than defend I internalize and this agitates the situation. I am emotional and scarred from situations that may have spawned my love of education but have also stunted my collaborative skills.
But, by responding with kindness and mindfulness rather than frustration, maybe I can redirect the trajectory of the negativity that often finds its way in my direction. If I hold my convictions near to my heart but also welcome in the ideas of my teammates then we can hopefully find common ground. Words are thoughts and goals we seek to endeavor upon. Action is clarification, unravelment, solution. With momentum and intent any situation can be turned around. Letting go of the past is a beginning but an acceptance of the present is a huge leap forward. Do not try to be someone else, everyone else is taken. Do not try to be someone you are not, you are forged in steel and varnished with spirit and authenticity. But, with the stature has to come humility and grace and when faced with adversity we often lose sight of that. I felt I had to defend and thus arrogance immerged.
With intent moving forward I will be a voice of reason, albeit a whispered one. I will silence my apprehension and trepidation and welcome challenges and sideways glances. I will not allow the judgment of others to weaken my footing or my outlook. I will be open-minded, forgiving, and supportive. These are skills my math teacher taught me oh so long ago, at the age of which my students are now. Empathy should never be neglected or even lessened because those around you lack it. In fact it should be heightened and illuminated because the smallest of smiles, winks and subtle glances of acknowledgement can literally change a life.
I was twelve, I remember it vividly, I had spilled apple juice on my literature book and the corners of the book were soaked. This had happened in my back pack, a lunch bag explosion that occurred frequently because of the amount of books we had to lug around throughout the day. We couldn't afford a lunch box so my lunches were placed in paper bags, like most of my classmates. But, I chose to stuff mine in the top of my back pack rather than carry it around. Mostly because it generally ripped open at some point, before lunch, spilling the contents all over the floor. The situation made more embarrassing because I was an outsider, a target, and no one would help me pick it up. Instead, they would deliberately stomp on the food or kick my sandwich down the hallway. That day's lunch had a chocolate pudding cup and Mandarin oranges, my favorite, so I was being over protective. Unfortunately this vigilance led to another altercation with my literature teacher.
He did not like me. I was shy and the brunt of most of the jokes that circulated the classroom, which he chose to either laugh at or ignore completely. This in turn, led to more bullying. This day was no exception. When he saw the yellow, juice coated corners of the book he tore it out of my hand and proceeded to demoralize me. "How irresponsible of you. These are brand new books and you ruined it. You are an embarrassment to 7th grade. No wonder every one makes fun of you." Laughter ensued. He told me I had to stay after school and borrow a book and that I no longer had privileges of having my own. A scolding that should have been private at least, became a spectacle of sorts. The teacher across the hall had to come over and investigate the uproar. She was my math teacher, she was always nice to me.
When she entered, the laughter stopped causing even my literature teacher to pause in place. She was a gentle person. never raised her voice, always smiled, but she also had a teacher glare that would cause anyone to second guess their actions. "What's going on in here?" she asked mindfully, a calm in her voice. He walked over to her, showed her the book and began to chuckle and explain how irresponsible I was. She cut him off. "I believe it is you who is being irresponsible, she is twelve and this was an accident and you are an adult and this behavior is deliberate." He thought about responding, but she stood her ground with eye contact, silence, authority. He walked over and handed me back my book. "Let it dry out before you put it back in your back pack. I will make sure you pay for the damages too." As he was walking back to his desk, she turned to me and smiled, winked and gave me a subtle, I got your back smirk. That moment changed my life.
Second Guessing in the Face of Adversity
The teacher gene was turned on that day. With the idealism of a young teacher, I was hyper focused on my students, not on being a team player. I really never had any problems other than my colleagues not appreciating my radical approach. I followed the rules, I even taught with alignment, but then I would find time to venture off and get a little organic, primal. I knew from the moment my literature teacher was shut down by my math teacher, that my focus was always, no matter the consequences, going to be about creating a safe haven for learning and to build relationships with my students. This is a stronghold I have never waned on. Not even slightly. But, it does tend to ruffle feathers. So again I am the brunt of the negative discourse. A situation I am well-adjusted to but would prefer to stay clear of.
Recently I have been called an elitist, an outsider and even the cause of team dynamics not being at optimal. I shut down. I let the voices of judgment linger a little too long and it took me back to that classroom where I was misunderstood and ridiculed for being different. I used to loathe myself because I was Dyslexic and self-confident and ruthlessly determined. When you grow up in the schools I grew up in, witnessing the dark side of education, you become very self aware and you create a persona that you use when you come up against any kind of resistance or incursion. It has taken a lot of reflection and soul searching to get to the bottom of my fear and disillusionment. I have come to see the attributes that I ignore sometimes in self-preservation. Arrogance is one of these and it is something I fail to address sometimes and thus neglect to grow past. It is one thing to be self-confident another to be perceived as elitist and arrogant.
Arrogance can be overt or slight but it is never appreciated. I can come off very arrogant because I hold steadfast to my illusions of mindful relationships and the security of my students. If I up the rigor or push the bar it is only because I know what is best for my students. I do not claim to be the smartest person in the room, I am so not, nor do I claim to know more or be better, I just pronounce that I know what I am doing. What is best for some students may not be the best for others, this I know to be undeniably true. However, for my students, I know. Compromising this for any reason is not on the table. This puts me in the cross-hairs. An uncomfortable place to be. Often, I am seen as the problem because I try to will others to my cause. This is wrong. What I need to do instead, be the best I can be and hope I inspire others. I stay quiet in the face of angry voices and this appears as compliance. What I need to do is to find the bravery, the courage to be like my math teacher from so many years ago, eye contact, silence, authority.
Complaining is Mere Fodder, Action is Momentum
As I reflect in my journal every night, I have been doing more complaining then coming up with solutions. I have been reminded that taking the offensive does not solve problems, often it exacerbates them. It is being made clear to me that when I remain steadfast in my position, I often lose sight of the visions of those around me. I need to open my mind to their point of view and support them as they often neglect to do for me. There is never an excuse to be unprofessional or rude. I have been in the direct line of these emotions and it does not feel good. Rather than defend I internalize and this agitates the situation. I am emotional and scarred from situations that may have spawned my love of education but have also stunted my collaborative skills.
But, by responding with kindness and mindfulness rather than frustration, maybe I can redirect the trajectory of the negativity that often finds its way in my direction. If I hold my convictions near to my heart but also welcome in the ideas of my teammates then we can hopefully find common ground. Words are thoughts and goals we seek to endeavor upon. Action is clarification, unravelment, solution. With momentum and intent any situation can be turned around. Letting go of the past is a beginning but an acceptance of the present is a huge leap forward. Do not try to be someone else, everyone else is taken. Do not try to be someone you are not, you are forged in steel and varnished with spirit and authenticity. But, with the stature has to come humility and grace and when faced with adversity we often lose sight of that. I felt I had to defend and thus arrogance immerged.
With intent moving forward I will be a voice of reason, albeit a whispered one. I will silence my apprehension and trepidation and welcome challenges and sideways glances. I will not allow the judgment of others to weaken my footing or my outlook. I will be open-minded, forgiving, and supportive. These are skills my math teacher taught me oh so long ago, at the age of which my students are now. Empathy should never be neglected or even lessened because those around you lack it. In fact it should be heightened and illuminated because the smallest of smiles, winks and subtle glances of acknowledgement can literally change a life.
Wednesday, October 11, 2017
The Adventure of a Lifetime: Anticipation, Agitation, Action!
Inspiration
When you are feeling under the weather and are stuck in bed with the flu two things happen: You sleep a lot and you reflect. I spent the last five days reflecting on why I became a teacher. I thought about how I learn, how we all learn and grow. Also, how each of us are so unique and beautiful but how we are also connected by three universal themes: adventure, curiosity and conquest of self-doubt and ignorance. No one chooses to be uneducated or illiterate. In fact, the pathfinder and pioneer in all of us needs only to be supplied with the tools of exploration and discovery and with a little imagination, we will always try to answer the questions that our minds ask. It is a human trait to be inquisitive. As educators, we need to recognize this and simply step aside and let students loose on their adventure, devices and implements in hand.
We Are All Adventurers
At heart we are all adventurers. We love the anticipation of traveling somewhere new and exciting, even if it is vicariously through our television sets. We go to the movie theater to be swept away from reality and immersed in the fantastical worlds of our favorite characters. Often though, we forget to pause and look around us, delve into our own presence, sensibility, actuality. For many of us, education envelops our context and framework of life. We love what we do. We appreciate the opportunity to shape young minds, to be the next generation of curious, innovative, explorers.
Deep down we know that this profession is not about data or test scores, popularity or fame. It is about planting the seed. The concept of individuality. The notion of free thought and expression. The particle of mindset and that ringing in the ears that is both constant and persuasive. All leading to the purpose of learning something new every day, betterment and growth. We need to not merely be adventurers but navigators, swashbucklers and daredevils. Embrace every adventure with anticipation, adrenaline and action. Accept agitation and learn to circumnavigate the gale.
Anticipation and Acquirement
Anticipation is the spark. As we traverse the current of knowledge we will only continue to fight our way upstream if we believe there is a treasure at the mouth of the river. Like any swashbuckler or daredevil, we are looking for an opportunity for excitement and wealth, only in this case it is not monetary but acquirement of something far more timeless, fulfillment. We need to be both intrigued and scrutinizing: we will only truly learn if we find the topic personal and interesting.
Even the most tedious or boring content needs to be spiced up in order for us to stay focused. We are human after all. We have to focus our attention somehow. In the classroom, teachers and students alike, enjoy the unknown, discovering new things and determining a way to integrate new information into our schema. Personal strategies are the beacon of light that guides our ship to shore. As educators, all we need to do is make sure the beam is bright enough for all the ships to make it safely back to harbor. If we get students fascinated and a little perplexed they will take the wheel and guide themselves into the dock even in the most tumultuous of waters.
Impetus and Agitator
Like any situation, adventurers need that impetus to journey away from what is comfortable and familiar. To sail the high seas in search of bounty. The impulse for cultivation and extension is embedded in us. It is the drive that keeps society advancing and technology skyrocketing. It takes only a hunch, an inkling of creativity or imagination to get the ball rolling. But the momentum to forge ahead has to be nurtured and coaxed. Bolstered by success. Reinforced by triumph. Augmented by failure and setbacks. Buttressed by the unwavering support of those around us. As educators, we not only inspire and get students curious, we also are their sounding board in which they can find their footing on deck and keep the stern level in the storm.
There are agitators and reactionaries that stand firm on the dock ready to steer us back out to sea unexpectedly. As students, this can be detrimental to our learning. When we lose our faith in ourselves it can blind us and we get off course. We need a strong sense of the stars so we can use them to find our way back on track. It is these skills, that as educators, we must pass on to our students. This strategy is needed to keep their sails strong in the winds of adversity: autonomy and self-reliance. Agitation does not have to mean permanent upheaval. A disturbance or commotion yes, but this stirring leads to a solution and this unfolding of truth leads to the acquisition of knowledge.
Ready, Set, Go: Action!
Action can be calm and personal or it can be collaborative and dynamic. Each of us learns and grows in a very individual and unique way. It is the anticipation and agitation that determines how we see the world. If we are given the opportunity to be autonomous and independent then our vision of personal growth is more fluid and flexible. Short-comings become accomplishments because we endure through them. We lose our fear and welcome the unknown, the challenging and what seems insurmountable. We feel vindicated when we reach the summit and can see how far we have come.
The journey may be one that encompasses camaraderie and collaboration, self-reliance and self-determination but ultimately it comes down to one thing: that voice inside us that beckons us out of bed in the morning, draws us to a good book or welcomes us into the classroom. It is the confidence we gain from being able to sketch, navigate and arrive at our own destination. Whether the voyage is bumpy or smooth we chose the mode of transportation, we chose journey's end and most importantly, we chose the discourse along the way. Let students be swashbucklers, daredevils, adventurers and they will envision the treasure and their chest of bounty will be overflowing.
When you are feeling under the weather and are stuck in bed with the flu two things happen: You sleep a lot and you reflect. I spent the last five days reflecting on why I became a teacher. I thought about how I learn, how we all learn and grow. Also, how each of us are so unique and beautiful but how we are also connected by three universal themes: adventure, curiosity and conquest of self-doubt and ignorance. No one chooses to be uneducated or illiterate. In fact, the pathfinder and pioneer in all of us needs only to be supplied with the tools of exploration and discovery and with a little imagination, we will always try to answer the questions that our minds ask. It is a human trait to be inquisitive. As educators, we need to recognize this and simply step aside and let students loose on their adventure, devices and implements in hand.
We Are All Adventurers
At heart we are all adventurers. We love the anticipation of traveling somewhere new and exciting, even if it is vicariously through our television sets. We go to the movie theater to be swept away from reality and immersed in the fantastical worlds of our favorite characters. Often though, we forget to pause and look around us, delve into our own presence, sensibility, actuality. For many of us, education envelops our context and framework of life. We love what we do. We appreciate the opportunity to shape young minds, to be the next generation of curious, innovative, explorers.
Deep down we know that this profession is not about data or test scores, popularity or fame. It is about planting the seed. The concept of individuality. The notion of free thought and expression. The particle of mindset and that ringing in the ears that is both constant and persuasive. All leading to the purpose of learning something new every day, betterment and growth. We need to not merely be adventurers but navigators, swashbucklers and daredevils. Embrace every adventure with anticipation, adrenaline and action. Accept agitation and learn to circumnavigate the gale.
Anticipation and Acquirement
Anticipation is the spark. As we traverse the current of knowledge we will only continue to fight our way upstream if we believe there is a treasure at the mouth of the river. Like any swashbuckler or daredevil, we are looking for an opportunity for excitement and wealth, only in this case it is not monetary but acquirement of something far more timeless, fulfillment. We need to be both intrigued and scrutinizing: we will only truly learn if we find the topic personal and interesting.
Even the most tedious or boring content needs to be spiced up in order for us to stay focused. We are human after all. We have to focus our attention somehow. In the classroom, teachers and students alike, enjoy the unknown, discovering new things and determining a way to integrate new information into our schema. Personal strategies are the beacon of light that guides our ship to shore. As educators, all we need to do is make sure the beam is bright enough for all the ships to make it safely back to harbor. If we get students fascinated and a little perplexed they will take the wheel and guide themselves into the dock even in the most tumultuous of waters.
Impetus and Agitator
Like any situation, adventurers need that impetus to journey away from what is comfortable and familiar. To sail the high seas in search of bounty. The impulse for cultivation and extension is embedded in us. It is the drive that keeps society advancing and technology skyrocketing. It takes only a hunch, an inkling of creativity or imagination to get the ball rolling. But the momentum to forge ahead has to be nurtured and coaxed. Bolstered by success. Reinforced by triumph. Augmented by failure and setbacks. Buttressed by the unwavering support of those around us. As educators, we not only inspire and get students curious, we also are their sounding board in which they can find their footing on deck and keep the stern level in the storm.
There are agitators and reactionaries that stand firm on the dock ready to steer us back out to sea unexpectedly. As students, this can be detrimental to our learning. When we lose our faith in ourselves it can blind us and we get off course. We need a strong sense of the stars so we can use them to find our way back on track. It is these skills, that as educators, we must pass on to our students. This strategy is needed to keep their sails strong in the winds of adversity: autonomy and self-reliance. Agitation does not have to mean permanent upheaval. A disturbance or commotion yes, but this stirring leads to a solution and this unfolding of truth leads to the acquisition of knowledge.
Ready, Set, Go: Action!
Action can be calm and personal or it can be collaborative and dynamic. Each of us learns and grows in a very individual and unique way. It is the anticipation and agitation that determines how we see the world. If we are given the opportunity to be autonomous and independent then our vision of personal growth is more fluid and flexible. Short-comings become accomplishments because we endure through them. We lose our fear and welcome the unknown, the challenging and what seems insurmountable. We feel vindicated when we reach the summit and can see how far we have come.
The journey may be one that encompasses camaraderie and collaboration, self-reliance and self-determination but ultimately it comes down to one thing: that voice inside us that beckons us out of bed in the morning, draws us to a good book or welcomes us into the classroom. It is the confidence we gain from being able to sketch, navigate and arrive at our own destination. Whether the voyage is bumpy or smooth we chose the mode of transportation, we chose journey's end and most importantly, we chose the discourse along the way. Let students be swashbucklers, daredevils, adventurers and they will envision the treasure and their chest of bounty will be overflowing.
Wednesday, October 4, 2017
The Singular Moment When You Lose Faith
I have been judged, ridiculed, even chastised. I have been corrected, "put in my place," even been told off. I listen and rarely fire back, I always think of comebacks or responses long after the person has left. They feel smug, entitled. I feel broken. I do not have thick skin, although I wish I had. As a professional one rightfully expects to be treated as one. When you are not it chips away at your spirit. It hardens you. The joy wheezes out leaving you deflated. Feeling disenfranchised and forgotten. I give it my all every day, never compromising or taking the easy way out. I wake up and decide intentions, which I speak aloud, reinforcing their power, their allure. I repeat them like a mantra.
It is all about perspective. I accept the backlash from being a rogue traveler. I listen to criticism and try to improve myself. I reflect a lot. I take responsibility for my short-comings, of which I have many. I am the only one to blame when things do not turn out as planned. I may have forgotten a step, spoken out of turn, believed in myself a little too much. I revel in improvement. What I do not frolic in, is those who assume to know my intentions or my values and whom pass judgment. I do not take it lightly when words are spoken that are not intended for the purpose of my betterment but the reduction of my spirit. To keep me in line. I may have whispers of discontent and even boisterous hollers of protest when it comes to my classroom and my students. But, I never claim to be better than someone else. Smarter than someone else. Even more thoughtful or graceful than those amazing educators around me. I am merely me.
Today my idea of myself was fractured, like a slow crack in the glass, it is crumbling and shattering spreading across the surface. When this happens it makes it difficult to focus, to clearly see any vision. Now, hindered and blocked even the smallest of tasks seems unsolvable. My purpose, my students. My goal, my students. My reason, my strength, my joy, my students. This is undeniable. I know this in my heart. I have let doubt and negativity in. I am truly upset with myself. I usually cry and vent alone. Share my frustration with my closest friend. Then I shake it off, like a wet dog climbing out of a trickling brook. Both heavy and refreshed from the bath. This time though, I am still drenched. I choose right now to lie in the sun and dry in its light and warmth. That is the only way I can enter the doors and take solace in my classroom tomorrow.
A word spoken today during my book chat, was empathy. This is an easy sentiment but a challenging disposition. When we put ourselves first, which we need to in many circumstances, we lose sight of empathy. But, I am going to focus on that tomorrow. My intention for Thursday. It ties in to mindfulness and I often focus so much on being joyful and kind that I too forget to embrace empathy. Character is all about what we choose to do every day. I feel bruised and marred. But, from this moment on I will use this to not to feel sorry for myself, or to even try to make sense of someone else's notions, but to feel emblazoned to prove those that have made judgments wrong. You only feel disenfranchised and undervalued if you let someone else make you feel that way. I choose not to.
It is all about perspective. I accept the backlash from being a rogue traveler. I listen to criticism and try to improve myself. I reflect a lot. I take responsibility for my short-comings, of which I have many. I am the only one to blame when things do not turn out as planned. I may have forgotten a step, spoken out of turn, believed in myself a little too much. I revel in improvement. What I do not frolic in, is those who assume to know my intentions or my values and whom pass judgment. I do not take it lightly when words are spoken that are not intended for the purpose of my betterment but the reduction of my spirit. To keep me in line. I may have whispers of discontent and even boisterous hollers of protest when it comes to my classroom and my students. But, I never claim to be better than someone else. Smarter than someone else. Even more thoughtful or graceful than those amazing educators around me. I am merely me.
Today my idea of myself was fractured, like a slow crack in the glass, it is crumbling and shattering spreading across the surface. When this happens it makes it difficult to focus, to clearly see any vision. Now, hindered and blocked even the smallest of tasks seems unsolvable. My purpose, my students. My goal, my students. My reason, my strength, my joy, my students. This is undeniable. I know this in my heart. I have let doubt and negativity in. I am truly upset with myself. I usually cry and vent alone. Share my frustration with my closest friend. Then I shake it off, like a wet dog climbing out of a trickling brook. Both heavy and refreshed from the bath. This time though, I am still drenched. I choose right now to lie in the sun and dry in its light and warmth. That is the only way I can enter the doors and take solace in my classroom tomorrow.
A word spoken today during my book chat, was empathy. This is an easy sentiment but a challenging disposition. When we put ourselves first, which we need to in many circumstances, we lose sight of empathy. But, I am going to focus on that tomorrow. My intention for Thursday. It ties in to mindfulness and I often focus so much on being joyful and kind that I too forget to embrace empathy. Character is all about what we choose to do every day. I feel bruised and marred. But, from this moment on I will use this to not to feel sorry for myself, or to even try to make sense of someone else's notions, but to feel emblazoned to prove those that have made judgments wrong. You only feel disenfranchised and undervalued if you let someone else make you feel that way. I choose not to.
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