Fragments and Morsels
We are fragmented into so many aspects of ourselves. Roles,
relationships, responsibilities. Perspective, personality, purpose. Want, need,
denial. Listening side, observing side, assembling side.
Each of our fragments are scattered about. Some days we find the
writing, teacher, transformation pieces. Other days our need, quiet reflection,
isolation pieces appear. Each particle, like an atom of ourselves, fit together
to make us whole.
But we also carry with us, slivers,
and grains of such deep emotion that they stay attached to us every day. We
wake up and feel them poking into our sides. We stir to possibility and feel
them taking shape and clinging to us, as if we just exited the ocean.
Some like granules of sand, buff against our already cold skin.
They are reminders, dictations, and jarring clarity- we so desperately are
trying to shed. Yet these little morsels stick. They leave marks and pocks our
flesh incorporates into itself. Students, teachers, and everyone in every
situation across the globes, have these crumbs of pandemic perspective fastened
to their psyche.
Concentration Abides
We concentrate, we focus. We
accomplish and master. We pivot and adapt. We smile, laugh, and live for
moments with those we love. We cry and shiver under the blankets at night-
searching for something we do not know how to find.
We turn our imaginations up a notch- overloading our senses. We
dream, idealize, see the good in people. Yet, that edge, that sharpness of
anxiety remains. We can shake like a dog after a bath- we can dry off with a
beach towel- but the miniscule accumulation attaches. Itchy and irritating.
So many contradictory voices, motions, ideas, feelings- they are
all struggling for control. Our compasses are spinning. Our binoculars are out
of focus. Yet, we keep travelling, searching, taking adventures.
It is engrained in us, this concentration and fragmentation. We
are in flux, imploding and exploding, like a giant collision and expansion. We
can be irrational, but we can also be so compassionate, empathetic and we are
not stagnated beings, we are explorers and rebels.
Lenses Shiny, Social Dimming
When we are given the choice, those of us who have accepted the position
to advocate and accept the responsibility of education- we stand heads held
high- even when we are in a moment of uncertainty. We have a moment of panic,
we vent- but we stay resolved to our path.
We know that even with the pandemic, students need us. Learning
needs to, as it has always been, be the center of a child’s life. We must make
sure they have an opportunity to go to school. Distance or in person- either
way, it has to be equitable and meaningful.
Before and after. This is the event- the cycle- the shatter, that
scattered.
My son said yesterday “I am lucky enough to have been in the last
graduating class of the before-group. Most of my friends are in the first after-group.”
This struck me deeply. I asked him what that truly meant to him.
He replied “I got to have four years of ‘sameness’ of how it has
always been. I guess I didn’t have to think about the after. If things would
not be the same as they have always been. I had the image of school we all see
in movies and television- the social gathering and learning place.”
What does that mean, I asked? “We go to school, play sports, hang
out with my friends. Now most of my friends have to go to their first year of
college at home. The social aspect of school is gone. The socialization that
school was designed to provide seems to be going away. It’s sad.” He shook his
head. “I guess I was lucky.”
Sad indeed.
The handshakes, hugs and fist bumps might just be a thing of the
past. Fragments of yesterday, scattered to the wind. Seeing each other’s faces,
watching each other smile. That connection of facial recognition will be hidden
behind a mask.
Sitting in groups, collaborating side by side, one-minute check-ins
at my desk, my makerspace sharing corner, our collaborative graffiti wall, all
have to become something else.
The lunchroom shuffle becomes classroom eating areas. Staggered class
changes and locker breaks. Bathroom restrictions. No more beautification in the
mirror with a gaggle of friends. So many ways school will no longer be a social
arena.
The After
It is going to be so important for educators, to make sure to
continue to safely provide interaction and community building activities. Teacher
and student relationships need to strengthen and yes, pivot- but they need to
continue to be the focus- for what students are going to need now is
familiarity within the fluctuating and altering routines of school. They need
it to feel like school. They need it to feel comfortable and safe.
Teachers need it to feel comfortable and safe too.
If teachers want to teach on-line, then they should be able too.
If teachers want to be in their classrooms, they should be able too. Parents
should have a choice too. These choices, these fragments of the educational
system need our focus and acceptance.
Then the learning aspect of school will unfold, and lessons will transform,
and activities will provide those ever-needed concentration moments- the
opportunities for community and reassembling of an after, that in many ways
resembles a before- but with the necessary upgrades.
The Role Playing is Still Afoot
Things are in the afterburn, the afterglow, the fuzzy combination
of opinion, decisions, and circumstances. Some schools will be able to open
their doors, others will choose to distance and teach virtually. Many will
combine the two. The higher ups will decide.
It is a frozen fragment at this moment, a stop in the rhythm- like
in the Matrix, we are slowly dodging incoming- we hear the synthesized music,
see the trails as we spin in the air. We feel not quite in control, at the
mercy of gravity.
We are not NPC’s in our world. We are character’s, we are storytellers,
we are shaping the action, interactions, and choices of our guild. We have to
remember that we know where most of the fragments are. We just have to collect
them.
The only problem is right now- we are at the mercy of the DM, the
dungeon masters of our profession. They are sitting behind their screens,
rolling their dice, hedging their bets. AND we as players in this adventure,
are awaiting our fate. Yet, we remain at the table, for we know what ever
unfolds next, will be worth it.
No comments:
Post a Comment