Ekitai Rashku a Japanese phrase meaning “to want to shout out.” Yet, interpreted or translated as – “like liquid.” Either to me works. I choose to be solvent, flexible, fusible. Staying open, eager, wishful- even a little zealous. I can fill a container, push at the sides, leave a mark. But I, like a true fluid, resist any force tending to cause one layer to move over another. I stretch, bolster and amplify- I expand and I inevitably, retract daily. But this resistance is offered, only while movement is taking place. Thus, I never stay still for long.
The moment I forget my imaginative heritage, my little pieces of paper, the ones I hide behind something more exigent, the liquid becomes viscous. I fight the adhesiveness. Feeling fastened and tacky, I struggle, I get tenacious and courageous. But I stay in place, clinging to nectar of opportunity halted. The more you labor, the more you get swallowed by the goo. The more you are look at the fixed, the less you agitate.
Stay liquid, learn not to resist the glutinousness. Slowing to the discontinuous- however frustrating, it is necessary. Listening for the intermittent, leads us to the persisting. The continuous little pieces of paper, the ones we hide behind the more exigent. The ones that fall to the floor, as we open a dusty book of goals, we placed on a shelf. The shreds of what we were so focused on, a few months back. The glitter of lost hope.
They might be frayed and tattered- but they were never disposed of. Just hidden, out of focus, a little blurred in the pinpoint, of requirement and predicament. Dig them out, slide them to a center, make a giant pile (if there are many). If there are few, create a mosaic, both motley and tessellating, like a vibration of the past- can you hear it? Feel it? Then stop struggling and accept the viscous honey. Its sweet with endeavor.
Here, in this moment- think it over. Find the resolve to agitate. No joke, nothing is free. Time being the most expensive. Yet, its affordable, if we budget.
This last week has been very hectic, nothing syrupy but definitely, mucilaginous (I love this word). It reminds me of Metamucil the fibrous supplement. An aid in the unclogging, essentially. I utilized the tool of extrication this week. I had to make room for the uncomfortableness of recognition, the requirement of compensation and the joy of mentorship. I had to unclog and unsettle- and unencumber mind, spirit and body.
Accepting acknowledgement has always been difficult for me, especially when I yearn for it, yet when I receive it, I tend to underplay it. But, inside I am screaming, Ekitai Rashku. As Sally Field so eloquently said at the Oscar’s in 1985 “You like me, you really like me.” I was one of many, yet it felt personal. I felt appreciated and for a long time, I didn’t. It means a lot coming from parents. It means a lot- that I was considered worthy.
I worked many hours beyond the school day, morning and afternoon practices- three nights at the STEAM center, a Saturday tournament, in which I hosted at my school. Yet, I also had the opportunity, to follow and mentor my team. I got to see each of my teams play and watch their synergy and dedication. I got to host, but also mentor. So, it was a great day.
Sunday morning, exhausted, I get to reflect by writing here- one of my two blogs that some people read. Now that is definitely honey. Silent approval.
I tend to write about the struggles. We all feel the viscosity. But we also feel the fluidity, the liquid, the freedom, we have to fill the container, coat the sides, stretch ourselves. We also have the ability, to stay calm, undisturbed and stay stagnate and undecided. Filling the container but accepting our vessel. The thing about vessels is, they are meant for transport. For traveling, for movement, for a destination.
They are the bearers of liquid and if Ekitai Rashku is truly our nature- we have to have a way to channel it. We have to have an arteriole motive (see what I did there?). We must construct a vast network of give and take. We have to over-extend, become solitary and then sit back and submerge ourselves, in the luscious, ichorous, aqueous, solvent. Whether we free style, wade or bathe- we have to swim.
This week I paddled, floated on my back as I slept, and let the current carry me to Sunday. I opened many a book, let the little pieces of fall- created a mosaic, that at first seemed messy and discombobulated, yet at weeks end- as I take a long look at the cracks and colorful tiles, is very much concise and calculated.
In the moment we may feel like a molecule swishing and circulating- but if we relax and let the liquid elevate, even become a little viscous, we will see we are essential -maybe not a keystone to many, but definitely a keystone to some. On occasion, we choose to be anchored, settle, float to the bottom. But, when we look up- we see the translucency and we know if push off from solidity, we will find the flow of liquidity. This week, I was zealous, stubborn, purposeful and mellifluous- and here I am- eager for the next.
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