The Daily Grind- A Deluge Determined (45)

I heard a comedian say "You don't need a 5 hour energy drink, you just need to lie down for awhile." We are sucked in by the social media buzz of- how to be productive, how fast to move, how to be bigger, faster, better.

We can't just settle our mind, calm our spirit, take a breath- because if we do, we are lagging behind the curve. So we literally, face the daily grind- caffeine- double espresso, latte, tall black coffee.  We figuratively, face the daily grind- by running an endless treadmill, just trying to survive.

About two months ago- I was so tired, emotionally and physically, I cried myself to sleep for a week. I was constantly on social media: Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and living vicariously through people I do not know and most likely never will. Their classrooms were perfect, they wrote books, they were celebrated by their colleagues. 

They were travelling and having wonderful, unblemished vacations. They dressed exquisitely, they ate healthy, impeccable diets- even though they didn't need to because they were practically Utopian in every way. In fact after a few months of unplugging- I took a peek today, they still reign supreme. 

I still feel like a hamster in a cage, on an endless cycle of uphill and free fall. But, I have a little more understanding now. An empathetic mindset. A realistic appreciation for their grace and style. There are simply, amazing people out there. They are fantastic hosts of an outlandish, heavenly realm. I, a resident of a reasonable, pragmatic one.

I thought long and hard about it- I do not want to live in the fast-paced, mayhem of popularity and fame. I prefer the quiet, commonsensical one I call home. I have done a lot of soul searching. I have reflected. I have meditated. I have become steadfast in my growth all the while staying grounded in my dreams. My dreams are my personal social media.

Today is Valentine's Day- I hesitated to get on any social platform. I am not a Hallmark Holiday person. Nor do I want to see another bright red heart, not today. I love my husband 365 days a year. I love my children 365 days a year. I do not need a day where I feel required to love them more. 

I watched today as students carried around giant stuffed animals, huge bouquets and giant boxes of chocolate- they were badges of honor- to 12 and 13 year old's. They say, "I matter." While many students, defeated and visibly deflated, tried to keep their heads down and avoid the giggles and screams of the recipients. When did it become such an isolating event- this day of love?

Social media has created such a wave of we -have to fit in, have to make sure I do what I need to make my other-half happy. It has created a day of as much sadness and loneliness, as it has temporary elation. The daily grind, often helps me keep my head to the 'grindstone' - I almost forgot it was Valentine's Day. Until I saw the deluge of red and pink, coming up the hallway.

Today I made sure to make contact with all of my students who felt left out and disappointed. I looked them in the eye and said "Thank you for coming today- I am so happy to see you." We joked about the size of stuffed animals and bouquets, the sheer amount of candy that was exchanged. I tried to make them laugh. I hope a smile and hello, made a difference.