Be Where your Feet are (224)

 Calm down, find yourself present and in the moment. Focus on what you can control. If you are writing, write and try to clear your head of distractions. If you are with family, be with family and try not to think about school or Covid-19, or social distancing. Minimize the mental lists you have, in constant shuffle mode, in your mind.

We are excited about possibilities- some with trepidation, others with optimism- but we are on overload. The sheer volume of great things is like an avalanche. And FOMO is contagious. We can't be high energy and productive every minute of everyday.

Like with any social media- we are generally seeing the perfect scenario, the life free from any blemishes. There is amazing stuff happening, and we can't always participate. We often don't have the same opportunities to do so. So we feel inadequate.

Most people do not share their flaws or sadness. Yet, we all feel them. We choose to share the positive feelings. We all have those too. We are circling in a vortex of Pinterest perfect, Twitter terrific, Facebook fabulous. We feel less than. But we are not. We are us, and that is never less than.

 Those events are elsewhere. We are here. We need to be where our feet are. We need to manage our expectations, especially the ones we make for ourselves. We are in a strange time where enthusiasm is like punctuated equilibrium- we get peaks of it, then level off for a while. 

I want to be that perfect social media image of a superhero. Yet, most of us, are what I think of myself as, a quest seeking druid, who does not have unlimited powers. But who does have a great map. And a great napsack of tools.

Being everything to everyone is impossible. Being focused and balanced 24/7 is impossible. 

I have a perfectionist streak and I let the pressure build, until it pops at the corners, leaving me exhausted and stressed out. Because I do not live up to what I think, others expect me to be. In reality, no one is expecting- only I am acutely anticipating. Its draining and taxing. Tiresome in fact.

I have decided to find something small and relatively inexpensive, to focus my energy on. Other than the many tasks I am required to focus these days. School at the forefront. We have two weeks left of school. 

I used to collect tea post and snow globes. I do have a hefty collection, but somehow- I lost interest. Yesterday I picked up my nesting dolls, a student gave me last year, as I was cleaning out my classroom. They were shoved to the back of a shelf, they got lost for a bit. They were dusty, but inviting. I just stared at them and stacked them for a few minutes.

I allowed myself to just be in the moment. To notice every detail in the etching. Feel the grains in the wood. Feel the thickness of the paint. Notice the fine differences between each piece. I was hooked. I am going to start collecting them. I did a search on Amazon and eBay and am amazed at how many different styles there are. I can’t wait to compile a list.

Yes, another list. I make lots of lists- it’s the stability in my world. It helps me find my feet. Often I am not mentally, where my feet are. I can’t watch TV without thinking about school. I can’t read a book without thinking about writing. The list goes on. Yup, another list.

But, after staring at the nesting dolls- I realized something. Be where your feet are- whether you are the smallest doll or the largest, stacked inside or on display- make sure you are present. Make sure you are with your friends and family. Make sure you are in the moment, because when you are, the universe tells you amazing things.